presents:

What kind of predictable tourist plans a vacation out of travel guides? Not me. Used to be that being in a new city meant wandering around aimlessly or going where the guidebooks told me, which would always land me in places swarming with tourists! Yuck. So on my last trip to New York, I decided to follow my chubby little tummy around instead, sampling the various chow that the town had to offer. That way, I got a real taste of local color, avoided tourist traps, and got to eat tons of yummy chow, which is my first love.

I walked from one dining establishment to the next when I could, and that way I got to see and experience the city. Sometimes I took public transportation or a taxi when the distances were too great or when I was scared of getting mugged, and that rounded out the trip nicely.

I transformed a whole city into one big tasting menu! That means lots of little bites, pacing yourself so that you don't get too full to keep going. Forget about the "Breakfast-Lunch-Dinner", that's for saps! If you travel with a mate, share one burger at a burger shack. Split the drink. This is a marathon after all, not just a meal.

I've done the homework for you with the Metro-Menu, so you can just follow what I did if you want. Or use my experience as a guide for your own custom-made menu. Have fun, and happy traveling!

Day 1 in New York City:

1. Library Hotel
2. Doughnut Plant
3. Kossar's Bialys
4. Dumpling House
5. Honmura An
6. ChickaLicous

This is the place to stay!

Okay, this isn't a restaurant, but you have to sleep somewhere between bouts of eating. The Library is a lovely boutique hotel with a literate twist. The Dewey Decimal System organizes the thousands of books that live everywhere throughout the building. There's a big communal reading room and a poetry room. Each guest room has it's own theme. I was in the Technology floor in the Advertising Room.

The nicely priced rate includs a continental breakfast, coffees, and wine and cheese in the evenings.

Valrohna chocolate donut: ($1.75)
My personal favorite. A big, fluffy, chocolate enrobed vehicle for fat and sugar. The taste is “eggier” than I'm used to, but I adjusted quickly enough to eat the whole thing.

Cinnamon Bun: (about $2)
Pretty good, but it would have been even better if it was filled with more raisiny gooeyness.

Raspberry jam filled vanilla donut: ($1.75) not pictured
This isn't like a jelly donut that's filled up like a cream puff. It has a hole in the middle like a tire but instead of being filled with air, it's filled with a nice raspberry jam. Very tasty.

Coffee was okay they ground it up and brewed it fresh, but it was on the weak side and you didn't get your full force sugar/caffeine one-two punch.

Old school Bialy making.

Just a couple of doors down from Doughnut Plant is the home of more bready early-morning snacks.

I get the feeling that I didn’t come at the right time. All they had at 7:30 a.m. were plain bialys. I wanted one of the onion ones but they weren’t due out of the oven until half past donut. I got a plain one and gnawed on it unimpressed – but it was cool to watch the baking dude.

Premium Oshinko: ($12)
House made and imported picked vegetables. Refreshing and simple. You rarely find this as a starter option in Japanese restaurants.

Asparagus Salad: ($8)
Cold asparagus and endive with mayo based sesame sauce. Even though I’m not big on mayo sauced dishes, I really liked this.

3 carrots out of 4

Fat Albert's friend would say: "It's so-ba good-ba."

Three course dessert prix fixe menu with a choice of “main course” ($12)

Coconut marshmallow: pretty with the toasted coconut – but I would have preferred it nude.

Cranberry cookie: heart shaped and cute in it’s buttery goodness.

Rosewater truffle: I’m afraid that I am too much of a heathen to be able to discern the taste and aroma of the rosewater in this delicious, dark chocolate coated, wonderfully bitter, perfectly sized morsel of yumminess.